The Third NoHead War refers to the conflict between the S.M.S.B. and the Elite NoHeads lasting from 2031 until 2033. The war ended in Bast Castle following the downfall of Hell Burnbottom.

Origins Edit

In January 2030, a large breakout from Beta Prison occurred, leading to the release of NoHeads Whammo Fireball, Darren Slade, and the Lunch Money Bandit. Darren Slade defected afterwards, and was hunted down as a result. The other two escapees returned to service to Hell Burnbottom, though Whammo later regretted it. Together, they planned to make a complicated dark potion to return Hell Burnbottom to a body.

About a year later, the ghost of Mr. Stupid NoHead declared his intentions to take Jonathan’s life as his own, as he had already located the orphan. NoHead departed and, upon arriving, attacked ad course. However, Jonathan used the Sword of Abomination that he had acquired to decapitate him. Upon his destruction, he vanished into smoke. Although no one knew about this except Hell Burnbottom and Nagatha, it is likely Jonathan would have been famous for his victory had anyone did know.

After the destruction, Hell Burnbottom was still very weak and about to give up all hope when Whammo Fireball and the Lunch Money Bandit had returned to their master. Burnbottom planned to regain his old body and strength. To achieve this goal, Burnbottom would require the use of a Dark potion that required him to obtain the three main necessary ingredients for it, bone of the erutul, egg of the woarc, and flesh of the hero.



Return of Hell BurnbottomEdit

Rebirth of Hell BurnbottomEdit
"Only Lindsay will give a convenient effect. She killed me. She can do this for us. Her debt will be paid, whether or not she likes it."
―The spirit of Hell Burnbottom[src]

In the beginning, there were casualties which went unnoticed by most. Myra Gordon was captured by Whammo Fireball and the Lunch Money Bandit in summer of 2031. She was interrogated for information on Nagatha’s whereabouts and then tortured her. Jonathan, the orphan who destroyed NoHead’s spirit, was murdered by Hell Burnbottom on 3 February, 2031, after overhearing Burnbottom’s plans to murder Lindsay Kellerman.

During the events surrounding Red X’s arrival, Fireball killed an erutul for its bone, which he concealed within Lioness graveyard. Hell Burnbottom immediately sent a call telling him to send a probe to the MBH. He found that the S.M.S.B. members were all making plates as an assignment, and suggested Burnbottom turn Kellerman’s into a transport only she could touch. Burnbottom agreed to that and, shortly before the restoration, the Lunch Money Bandit performed the task. Fireball proceeded to the Tower of Reincarnation and prepared the network. The next day, Lindsay touched the plate, transporting her to the Tower of Reincarnation.

Through a dark network, Hell Burnbottom regained his physical form, and attempted to duel Lindsay Kellerman. He failed to win, however, as the ghost of the deceased Rotta Hecks came to the scene just as Burnbottom had the upper hand. She held back Burnbottom, allowing Kellerman to escape using the plate as a transport back to the MBH.

Government's denial Edit

Shortly after Kellerman emerged from Canada claiming Hell Burnbottom had returned, Evans, the President of the United States of America, refused to believe it, as it might compromise his position as President. Instead of working with Master Intelligence to prepare the community for battle and try to stop the Elite NoHeads, Evans, under the then unknown influence of mind control, launched a campaign to slander and discredit both Lindsay Kellerman and Master Intelligence, as Evans was paranoid that Master Intelligence was after his job. Evans used his influence at the Perpetual Seer to convince the public that Kellerman and Master Intelligence were crazy, attention-seeking liars and that everything was going well in the world.

Disappearances continued to occur as Burnbottom gained power, while the government turned a blind eye to it. The Elite NoHeads took full advantage of the government's denial and kept a low profile, rebuilding their forces quietly and secretly. They managed to recruit noils because the government refused to take the suggested actions. The only resistance the Elite NoHeads met with, at the time, was the S.M.S.B. itself, which was suppressed by the government's propaganda and threat of dismissal, thus furthering Burnbottom's freedom of action.

After Kellerman stood trial, Cardarphen cleverly used the NoHead Sign to summon Burnbottom, who hastily fled, thus causing Evans to finally believe Master Intelligence and Kellerman's claims about the NoHeads' return.

2032 Edit

Open war Edit

There were numerous casualties of war in 2032. When the State Senator refused to surrender the government, Hell Burnbottom and Cygnus Evans destroyed two famous bridges, drowning many Muggles. Flora Fortescue and Katie Black's successor both went missing and George Thames’ shop was emptied, but there was no sign of struggle. Flora Fortescue’s Ice Cream Parlor showed evidence of a struggle or fight, but no sign of her was ever found. A man named Octavius Jackson disappeared in the early spring. Darren Slade was found dead under a NoHead Sign for his defection. Police officer Emily Fiennes and Head of Law Enforcement Amelia Vane were murdered by unknown assailants. These events allowed Hell Burnbottom to replace the State Senator as the new head of government.

During this time, Hell Burnbottom also gathered the strengths of the lions, panthers and werewolves to his cause. Because of the government’s original denial, Burnbottom was able to rebuild his forces unhindered, which led the government to fall far too back behind by the time they finally accepted the truth. Burnbottom also set a plan in motion to assassinate Master Intelligence, the leader of the resistance against him, striking a crippling blow against the world’s morale as well as removing the S.M.S.B. from existence.

Attack on New York City Edit

Hell Burnbottom stormed into the Town Hall and ordered the governor to surrender. When he steadfastly refused, Burnbottom left, warning that “you’ll be sorry.” The next day, the NoHead Sign appeared over New York City and, moments later, Whammo Fireball, the Lunch Money Bandit, and Hell Burnbottom himself stormed through Park Avenue and Broadway Street, and broke into the Empire State Building. For as of yet unknown reasons, they ransacked Flora Fortescue’s Ice Cream Parlor, killing Flora Fortescue herself. They also assaulted Thames Metalle and the blacksmith chose to come with them quietly; no signs of struggle were left to be found. Taking stacks of guns to arm their fast growing legions with them, the original trio proceeded to quickly Disapparate.

To finish the job, Hell Burnbottom and his two minions destroyed the Golden Gate Bridge, flying around the bridge in a spiral motion to create a twisting and buckling movement on the bridge walkway, killing several pedestrians in the process.

Locating Darren SladeEdit

After Hell Burnbottom's restoration to his body and power, Darren fled for his life. Darren feared Burnbottom’s return because he had betrayed too many of the Dark Lord's servants to be allowed back into the fold, but the Lunch Money Bandit doubted he would get far, as the Dark Lord had "ways of tracking his enemies". Contrary to Cygnus' belief, Darren was able to stay alive for a whole year, fleeing to parts unknown. Inevitably, however, Darren was finally tracked down to a shack in the north. He was killed by the Elite NoHeads, though he managed to put up a fight and pleaded mercy, and Darren's body was found in the shack for his disobedience to the Dark Lord, under the NoHead Sign.

2033 Edit

Sebiscuits Cardarphen’s death Edit

Near the end of the war, Sebiscuits Cardarphen had a vision that goaded him to fight Hell Burnbottom. He went to the castle and hid in a compartment until he was found. The two engaged in a spectacular duel that resulted in Cardarphen slaying the snake Nagatha. Shocked and furious at Nagatha’s demise, Burnbottom slammed Sebiscuits off the ramp and fired a blast of lightning that decapitated him.

Hell Burnbottom’s murder of Sebiscuits Cardarphen merely sent Cardarphen’s soul to Kolob where he had a brief conversation with both Rotta Hecks and God himself before his resurrection. Ordered by Burnbottom to confirm Sebiscuits’ demise, the Lunch Money Bandit discovered that Sebiscuits was indeed dead. Whammo Fireball then carried Cardarphen to the front, as Burnbottom “had business to attend to.”

Battle of Bast Castle Edit

The Battle of Bast Castle began when Master Intelligence sensed Sebiscuits Cardarphen was in danger and rounded everybody together to rescue him. The S.M.S.B. forces included Lindsay Kellerman, Telekinibabe, Baby Strength, Force Baby, and Red X. As per usual, Master Intelligence led the charge. Immediately after takeoff, they were ambushed by at least thirty robotic fighters. The battle ensued, but no members were slain; all safely arrived at the castle for the ultimate showdown.

In the castle, the S.M.S.B. strike force believed Cardarphen had been murdered and Burnbottom claimed that he had been caught trying to escape and save himself (which was halfway true). However, Cardarphen returned from transit, revealing he was very much alive, and forced Burnbottom to retreat. With that, the majority of the S.M.S.B. clashed with the Rocket soldiers. Finally, Burnbottom returned to confront Lindsay Kellerman. Rocket soldiers were either cut down or deactivated. As the battle commenced, Whammo Fireball battled Telekinibabe, while the Lunch Money Bandit, whose name was Cygnus Evans, was fighting Sebiscuits. After the Lunch Money Bandit nearly murdered his opponent, Red X stepped in, defeating the NoHead acolyte.

Endgame Edit

After his rematch with Sebiscuits Cardarphen, Hell Burnbottom took off for his private quarters in the castle, though he eventually left to rejoin the fight. By the time he did, Red X had defeated the Lunch Money Bandit, Telekinibabe was still dueling Whammo, and the others had gotten free and were cutting down his army at a moderate pace.

Hell Burnbottom found Lindsay Kellerman amidst the chaos. Kellerman tried to reason with him, but Burnbottom wouldn’t listen. Kellerman and Burnbottom forcefully teleported into a construction site, where they began to duel. Burnbottom quickly seized the advantage, but then Master Intelligence intervened, the three engaged in a duel of epic proportions that left the construction site in ruins. Then, Burnbottom diverted the path of several broken shards, causing them to home in on Lindsay and Master Intelligence during their descent. Just then, Red X arrived and deflected the shards. Realizing he could not defeat his adversaries, Hell Burnbottom began to possess and torture Kellerman in the hope that Master Intelligence would sacrifice the girl in order to kill him. Just then, Red X returned and used the Verasect to kill Burnbottom, blowing him apart in the process. Shortly afterward, Red X destroyed the Verasect.

Aftermath Edit

Without Hell Burnbottom, the Lunch Money Bandit, and Whammo Fireball, the Rockets were confused and lost. The decrease in fighting effectively forced over 99 percent of the Rocket forts and locations to surrender to the government, and bringing the NoHead movement to an quick end. With the extermination of their leadership and the prompt-shutdown of most of their forces, the Rocket forces surrendered or dissolved, and their assets were soon subsumed by the S.M.S.B.

After the defeat of the NoHeads, twenty or more NoHead recruits were killed. The rest were imprisoned. The state Senator returned to power, and later took the position on permanently. Red X became famous for her victory. Celebrations were held in the MBH.

In the years following the Third NoHead War, the S.M.S.B. and government officials teamed up to lead a massive reform of the government in order to better combat Dark mutants in the future. In addition to the reforms Master Intelligence and Lindsay Kellerman revolutionized the police and with Sebiscuits Cardarphen, helped comfort many civilians who had lost their family members during the war.